On the heels of Valentimes (did this on purpose) day everyone clearly has love, relationships, intimacy, the lack thereof on top of mind. If you’ve followed my page on Instagram (@thewkender_) I regularly have discussions that circulate these topics and this post is all about what I’m finding.
1) There is not enough open forum discussion around relationships and how to navigate them in this digital era!
High level, love manifests itself differently today than it did in our parents era. You have to consciously abstain from the generational phenomena of social media to create a sliver of the situation that your parents had and to do so successfully is a great feat. With that in mind, our next best step is to have the conversations openly amongst ourselves about how to authentically leverage the endless resources at our disposal for good.
2) Endless resources could mean endless distractions.
I know people that have met each other through match.com or just through DM on a social platform who seem to have healthy loving relationships. I also know people that have ADD when it comes to finding a significant other and its largely because the sheer volume of options positions them poorly to choose. One quick solve is a dating checklist. I parsed mine out into two segments: Dating Material and Wife Material. Before I share, I recognize that this will evolve over time, but here is where I am today…
Relationship Requirements:
-Great communicator
-Intelligent
-Emotionally Intelligent
-Self-aware
-Attractive
-Good in bed
-Knows how to compromise
-Knows how to trust
-Knows God
-Doesn’t like to argue
-Is resilient
-Is compassionate
-Loves unconditionally
-Is humble
-Is loyal
Wife:
-Loves God and is willing to support in leading us spiritually
-Great Sex
-Pours into me and supports my ambition
-Has hustle
-Invests in building with my family
-Is a compliment to me, but is also a whole person
-Can be vulnerable with me and wants to problem solve together
-Is a diffuser of issues and not a catalyst for problems
-Probably can cook
3) Major key… Bustle Says the #1 way people are finding that perfect someone is through their friends. That said ditch the apps, they are temporary solutions and harken back to your years of olde… Do you like me Check yes or no!
Oh and Fashion lol!
As always i’m open to feedback so feel free to drop comments below. Hopefully this was helpful.
To A Life Worth Living,
The Wkender